My journey to Bikram Yoga Dallas….We arrived in Dallas the last weekend in August to our apartment in the Village that we literally rented off of the internet. The next day, I googled "Bikram Dallas," and eventually talked to Karen on the phone. She told me about the free day of yoga, September 4th. The studio was just around the corner and down the street; I couldn't use distance as an excuse. Right after class, I signed-up for the auto-debit, trying to eliminate any possible blocker. Having practiced before, I knew the benefits, but I also knew how hard it was to get started and keep going. The energy at Bikram Yoga Dallas is amazing. Each teacher has helped me work in different ways on different aspects of my practice. It also helps to have a studio full of welcoming, long-time practitioners, as well as energetic newcomers. Remember that Robin Williams movie (David will) where his world is dark and wretched but he can paint it with rich, vibrant colors. Practicing Bikram this time around feels like that—like coming back from the dead.
As the T-shirt says, I got a new body, mind, and life. Some of these new changes are welcomed, expected, and even familiar; others are unimagined and challenging. Practicing Bikram yoga has not given me the "perfect" life (surprise, surprise), but it has made me physically and spiritually strong and flexible, allowing me to appreciate—to find the pleasure and possibilities—in the challenges.
I took my first Bikram class in 1992. In San Diego, I practiced various forms of yoga and Kara Ho Kempo Karate daily until 1998, when I moved to rural Bolivia for two and a half years. Instead of returning to California, I moved to Columbus and began a PhD at Ohio State University. After I graduated in June 2006, we moved to Michigan for my first job. While working on my dissertation, I struggled unsuccessfully to get back in shape after the birth of my son. I began Bikram yoga for the second time in the spring of 2005, but my return was short lived. Writing this has made me realize that during those years I practiced the yo-yo diet and exercise plan. I would get going, but then get in a rut when I would drop everything to make a writing deadline or meet some other demand that seemed important at the time. My lifestyle had changed drastically—from active person to desk-potato—from eating healthy organic foods to frozen pizzas and coffee. Microwave popcorn was a food group. Work kept me sitting in front of my computer for 15-18 hours a day, seven days a week. Pregnancy, and then being a mom, seemed to take the rest of my energy. I slept less and less, getting down to about four hours a night. I looked and felt old, fat, and drained. I slouched. I had carpal tunnel and ulna nerve damage, eventually losing the feeling and strength in both of my hands.
I remember thinking, "how did I get here?" Not just how did I, a hot weather lover, end up in such a cold place, but how did I get so completely off-track that I could not appreciate my family or enjoy the career I had worked so hard to have? It was convenient to blame the weather, the mid-western diet, pregnancy, and my workload, so I did. Moving to Dallas was going to be my great escape to warm weather! I guess somewhere in the move I realized that I was a disaster and that moving to a new city would not get me off the yo-yo wheel.
One Bikram challenge barely made a dent but it was a beginning. It took about 100 classes for me to start feeling alive. Now, I realized how much yoga has changed my mindset. At first, I worried that my hand/elbow surgery would be a big set-back, but now I see how working through the limitations that the surgery presented, actually provided me with the possibility of taking my practice to a deeper level. Wow! I am living in a new world.
